How to see if your friend is gay
How Do I Support My Gay Friend?
by D’Ann Davis
“How undertake I help my gay friend?” This is a doubt we hear constantly in the Living Hope office, when out speaking at events, or from friends and church members from around the world. Twenty years ago several Christians asked this question, for not many knew any equal gender attracted people, or if they did know them, they were uninformed to their friend’s struggles. Today almost everyone knows of someone who identifies as gay or deals with a measure of equal gender attractions. Even if a Christian finds himself in a season of life where he does not personally know of a same gender attracted (SGA) person in his sphere of influence, this scrutinize is of utmost importance in illuminated of the adjust of our identity and the growing willingness of Christians dealing with SGA to openly chat about their issues. So how does one help a gay-identified friend or SGA friend?
The first response I typically give to this question is actually another question. “Does your friend recognize Jesus?” This is a vital first question any believer must tackle before attempting to aid a friend deal with her sexual attractions. This is because there are two different ro
When Your Best Ally Tells You He's Gay
Gay people are engaged in an ongoing struggle to have their rights recognized and regarded. As a direct person talking primarily to other straights. I hope to support all who are oppressed because of their sexual orientation. The point on gay men as opposed to lesbians is only a reflection of my personal knowledge.
A year ago, no one I knew was openly queer. My contact with homosexuality until then was probably quite standard. When I was seven, my mother talked to me about people called "fairies." She warned me to watch out for them, explaining that their existence was a pity for them and a nuisance for the rest of us. From then on, the issue was absent from conversation at home, except when something about Anita Bryant came on the news. We all regarded Anita as somewhat off the wall, but not out of any deeply felt views on homosexuality. At university, the words "gay" and "fag" were used only as insults to students so awkward or unpopular that the term "wimp" would not do. Homosexuality was spotlighted only once: when the women's studies class invited a female homosexual to speak and half the parents called up to complain.
These
Understanding the Situation
Sexual orientation is a personal matter, and unless your friend explicitly tells you, you can never be 100% sure. However, if you’re wondering whether your friend might be same-sex attracted, either because you suspect they’re struggling with their identity or you think they might own feelings for you, it’s key to approach the topic with sensitivity and respect.
Here are some common signs that might demonstrate your friend is gay and how to navigate the situation without making assumptions or making them uncomfortable.
1. They Avoid Talking About Their Love Life
If your friend dodges conversations about crushes or relationships but is pleasant talking about every other aspect of their life, it might be because they’re not ready to discuss their sexual orientation.
Examples:
- They change the subject when someone asks about their dating life.
- They rarely mention any romantic interests.
- They seem uncomfortable when discussing relationships with the opposite gender.
This doesn’t necessarily mean they’re gay, some people are just private, but if combined with other signs, it might be a clue.